EDWARD FOX-INGLEBY (CAD) – 35. A charming, vain, deceitful,
cynical, delusional, arrogant, callous Old Etonian politician. In
other words, a Cad.
MISS CONSTANCE APPLEBY – late 20s. A prim, proper blue¬stocking
stenographer, who isn’t afraid to challenge the Cad’s most ludicrous
claims. Also plays MOTHER, WALSH-AYNSCOT, MRS BEDFORD,
GERTIE, HUDSON, FORBES, GRANNY INGLEBY, FELICITY,
LADY URSULA CLOPPIN, DIANA, FLORENCE and VIOLETTA.
MR HENRY COLLINS – 30s. An impoverished researcher. A former
Winchester pupil who is honest, bitter, frustrated and envious of
the Cad, while trying to adhere to the truth. Also plays FATHER,
FREDDY DUNCATTON, CYRIL HEREWARD, BEDFORD,
GERALD CHIPPENHAM, LORD OLDHAM, SIR KNIGHTONBERRY,
WINSLOW BUDDINGTON STARRET, MINISTER, OTIS
WINCHESTER and PRIME MINISTER.
This play is designed for a cast of three.
One actor plays the CAD, who is dictating his memoirs – and plays
himself at various stages of his life.
One actor plays MR COLLINS, the researcher for the autobiography and
all the other male characters from the CAD’s past.
One actress plays MISS APPLEBY the stenographer of the
autobiography – and all the other female characters (and one or two
male characters, as necessary) who feature in the CAD’s past.
However, future productions could employ a cast as large as is necessary.